A little battered, many a bruise, Two of my teeth are in my shoes. My eyes are bruised, my knees may knock, My brain is addled by the shock. My nose is crooked, the septum twirled, But what the hell, I can rule the world.
Johanna, Oh yes, a frightening scenario, I agree! It used to totally creep me out when I was a little kid at the age of losing my baby teeth. Thank goodness for the compensation from the Tooth Fairy.
Stickup, I think Teddy's the kind of guy that would put vodka jelly on his burnt toast for breakfast. I'm fairly certain that those colours in his face are the result of "natural" causes and not just applied for effect in his 8x10 glossy promo shot.
A man is walking down the street when he hears a voice, "Pssst you come over here!" He looks round and can see no one but an old mangy greyhound. "yes over here!" Said the greyhound "Look at me I'm tied up here, I should be racing I won 14 races in my carrer you know?" The man thought to himself "Oh my god a talking dog, I have to have it, it will make me rich, tv appearances cabaret bookings" So he goes in search of the owner. He found the owner and said "I'd like to buy your dog, is he for sale??" The owner says "No mate you don't want that old moth eaten thing!" "But I do!" Insisted the man "I'lll give you 1000 pounds for him. "Ok said the owner but I think your making a big mistake!" Handing over the money the man said "Why do you think that?" The man replied "Because that dogs a bloody liar it's never won a race in it's life!"
A little battered, many a bruise,
ReplyDeleteTwo of my teeth are in my shoes.
My eyes are bruised, my knees may knock,
My brain is addled by the shock.
My nose is crooked, the septum twirled,
But what the hell, I can rule the world.
DCW,
DeleteSounds like you're channeling Cassius Clay from back in the day!
As always...I love these!!!
ReplyDeleteDanielle,
DeleteAs always, happy to please!
Poor fellow,his body may not go the distance at this rate!
ReplyDeleteRuby
Ruby,
DeleteThe spirit is willing but the flesh is weak?
it's his spirit that counts, not the countdown.
ReplyDeleteSuki,
DeleteExcellent punnage! A TKO with your wit.
I love this mess of a face and those knees!!!
ReplyDeleteBlue Sky,
DeleteTony's glad to hear his sex appeal is still working!
"i don't want to die without any scars"... (from fight club). love your maxims.
ReplyDeleteBeth,
DeleteI guess, then, that Tony is good to go.
Glad you're enjoying my quirky characters.
my nightmare: losing a tooth...
ReplyDeletegreat maxim, again!
Johanna,
DeleteOh yes, a frightening scenario, I agree! It used to totally creep me out when I was a little kid at the age of losing my baby teeth. Thank goodness for the compensation from the Tooth Fairy.
What a great face. And I love colors and especially, how you applied the color. Looks like he could use some of The Sagittarian's Vodka jelly!
ReplyDeleteStickup,
DeleteI think Teddy's the kind of guy that would put vodka jelly on his burnt toast for breakfast. I'm fairly certain that those colours in his face are the result of "natural" causes and not just applied for effect in his 8x10 glossy promo shot.
Your characters are fun too! Such personalities!
ReplyDeleteLynn,
DeleteI'm always surprised by who turns up!
this made me remember this old joke :-)
ReplyDeleteA man is walking down the street when he hears a voice, "Pssst you come over here!" He looks round and can see no one but an old mangy greyhound. "yes over here!" Said the greyhound "Look at me I'm tied up here, I should be racing I won 14 races in my carrer you know?" The man thought to himself "Oh my god a talking dog, I have to have it, it will make me rich, tv appearances cabaret bookings" So he goes in search of the owner. He found the owner and said "I'd like to buy your dog, is he for sale??" The owner says "No mate you don't want that old moth eaten thing!" "But I do!" Insisted the man "I'lll give you 1000 pounds for him. "Ok said the owner but I think your making a big mistake!" Handing over the money the man said "Why do you think that?" The man replied "Because that dogs a bloody liar it's never won a race in it's life!"
Roxana,
DeleteThat got a laugh out of me. Thanks for taking the time to share the joke.
:-D
P.S.
DeleteI usually don't find jokes funny!